Photo 741
Notes
Posted 6 hours ago
talesof4chan: 4chan reminisces over a familiar children’s book.talesof4chan.tumblr.com Zoom

talesof4chan:

4chan reminisces over a familiar children’s book.
talesof4chan.tumblr.com

via wylade
Video
Posted 1 day ago

I Broke Star Trek by BirgirPall

Photo 1992
Notes
Posted 1 day ago
tpmf: facts-i-just-made-up: Xbox One Controller Features Biometric Security In an attempt to quell the bad publicity generated by certain E3 announcements, Microsoft has announced a second round of features for the Xbox One, starting with its controller. Most technologically advanced of these features are the biometrics. Both thumbsticks feature fingerprint readers that can instantly recognize the player. This will not only allow users to sign in with a simple touch, but for the system to deny access to unregistered players who haven’t paid the guest charge. Pretty high tech stuff, but not the centerpiece of the new controller when it comes to functionality. The “Impulse Trigger” rumble motors will provide a new level of depth to gameplay. While the concept of a rumble pack goes all the way back to StarFox 64, the new Impulse system goes farther than any system to date to become one with the player. The trigger buttons both feature several tiny needles that (painlessly) penetrate the player’s fingers to deliver intense (painful) electrical shocks, while simultaneously sampling DNA and minor changes in blood chemistry that will let the game change to better fit the mood and, says Microsoft, even the ethnicity of the player. “We at Microsoft feel that the best Xbox games should be reserved only for the Aryan race,” said spokesman Francis Sham, “As most games will prove too demanding for degenerate bloodlines or “Mudbloods” as we call them, the controller will deny them access to most of our early releases. We still intend to cater to these audiences of course, and will be releasing games designed for them down the road that have been simplified for their inferior minds. Though this biometric system will be included in all Xbox One controllers, the modifications will prove costly so all previously ordered consoles will be shipped without any controllers, which will be sold separately for $299 each. The consoles won’t work without them and Microsoft is only manufacturing 700 in time for the release, so order yours today! let play the “Who in the notes believes this” game! Zoom

tpmf:

facts-i-just-made-up:

Xbox One Controller Features Biometric Security

In an attempt to quell the bad publicity generated by certain E3 announcements, Microsoft has announced a second round of features for the Xbox One, starting with its controller.

Most technologically advanced of these features are the biometrics. Both thumbsticks feature fingerprint readers that can instantly recognize the player. This will not only allow users to sign in with a simple touch, but for the system to deny access to unregistered players who haven’t paid the guest charge.

Pretty high tech stuff, but not the centerpiece of the new controller when it comes to functionality. The “Impulse Trigger” rumble motors will provide a new level of depth to gameplay. While the concept of a rumble pack goes all the way back to StarFox 64, the new Impulse system goes farther than any system to date to become one with the player. The trigger buttons both feature several tiny needles that (painlessly) penetrate the player’s fingers to deliver intense (painful) electrical shocks, while simultaneously sampling DNA and minor changes in blood chemistry that will let the game change to better fit the mood and, says Microsoft, even the ethnicity of the player.

“We at Microsoft feel that the best Xbox games should be reserved only for the Aryan race,” said spokesman Francis Sham, “As most games will prove too demanding for degenerate bloodlines or “Mudbloods” as we call them, the controller will deny them access to most of our early releases. We still intend to cater to these audiences of course, and will be releasing games designed for them down the road that have been simplified for their inferior minds.

Though this biometric system will be included in all Xbox One controllers, the modifications will prove costly so all previously ordered consoles will be shipped without any controllers, which will be sold separately for $299 each. The consoles won’t work without them and Microsoft is only manufacturing 700 in time for the release, so order yours today!

let play the “Who in the notes believes this” game!

via tpmf
Photo 6
Notes
Posted 2 days ago
They’re not evil, just misunderstood. Zoom

They’re not evil, just misunderstood.

Text 317
Notes
Posted 2 days ago

sjebooks:

takeawaygirl:

i’m changing my major to obstetrics just so i can perform circumcisions and ruffle maximum mra jimmies

i’m gonna major in gynecology and tell every feminist they have stage 4 breast cancer and watch them cry

via wangpatang
Text 12450
Notes
Posted 3 days ago

imtheprophetchuck:

I looked up “Jared Padelecki in places he shouldn’t be” and

image

LOOK

image

WHAT

image

I

image

FOUND

(Source: pizzasroll)

via im-a-fucking-bro
Photo 44187
Notes
Posted 3 days ago
itsvondell: voldey: Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse.  wow Newsflash, Microsoft actively trying to create the worst console ever Zoom

itsvondell:

voldey:

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse. 

wow

Newsflash, Microsoft actively trying to create the worst console ever

via dnanimal
Photo 61
Notes
Posted 5 days ago
courtneycrawford: Someone asked for a Re-bloggable version Also, I would like to point out that they were acting in a way that society told them was OK. That doesn’t make the action OK, but you do have to take into account what the social norms are. Zoom

courtneycrawford:

Someone asked for a Re-bloggable version

Also, I would like to point out that they were acting in a way that society told them was OK. That doesn’t make the action OK, but you do have to take into account what the social norms are.

via nvbluecat
Text 99198
Notes
Posted 5 days ago

mybunnynietzsche:

kirakirahanabi:

mathmaticalkrillbits:

anondracomalfoy:

bless you if you can admit your favorite character has flaws.

And bless you if you can admit your least favourite character has good points.

and then there was umbridge.

UMBRIDGE.

via barbershopping
Photo 2414
Notes
Posted 5 days ago
luke-garner: a haiku is only three lines  and in order this haiku is  5 syllables, 4 syllables, 3 syllables, and 5 syllables when the traditional way of writing a haiku 5 syllables, 7 syllables, and 5 syllables.  I think it’s just a poor choice of font size. “Are you kidding me” five syllables “Who the fuck threw that red shell” seven syllables “I will fuck you up” five syllables Still a poorly formatted post, but with a little re-arranging it does fit the five-seven-five rule of haiku’s.

luke-garner:

a haiku is only three lines 

and in order this haiku is 

5 syllables, 4 syllables, 3 syllables, and 5 syllables when the traditional way of writing a haiku

5 syllables, 7 syllables, and 5 syllables. 

I think it’s just a poor choice of font size.

“Are you kidding me” five syllables

“Who the fuck threw that red shell” seven syllables

“I will fuck you up” five syllables


Still a poorly formatted post, but with a little re-arranging it does fit the five-seven-five rule of haiku’s.

via luke-garner